Two Worlds
My first thought is that i need to change the name of my blog. i mean christy g how original is that?? so i am waiting for inspiration as to a new title.
Ok what I really what to tell. Callie and I went to see the rockettes last weekend at the Fox Theater. Seeing the dancing makes me miss it even more. I'm at this point where I see dancers performing and it almost brings me to a point of tears because I miss it so much. Crazy, I know. But I just can't right now. This is where the Lord has me. When I take class, my head goes through the roof. But I'm trusting that in His time I will be able to excerise that passion. And if not, well, Father knows best. Yet again another tangent.
So on the ride to atlanta with Cal, there was lots of time to talk. In talking to her I have realized that I'm trying to live in two completely different worlds. I don't know if any of you can relate, but if you can, you know what a trial it is. I am at home in montgomery, but I still try to live in the auburn world. I was going to auburn like twice a week. But everytime I come up there I realize that I'm not living up there. I don't know how everyone is and what the are dealing with. I don't know all the jokes anymore because I wasn't there when they happened. I enjoy the people that i love and their company, but i leave feeling even more isolated.
And talk about isolation. I am in montgomery. I don't know people my age in montgomery. Everyone I was friends with is off at school. I'm not in school, which has been such a blessing. But living a life of being in school at college is completely different from the rest of the world. When you are on your campus its so hard to remember there is a huge world out there. Life is passing you by so quickly because the college lifestyle is so quick paced. Where as outside of that "bubble" is completely different. I 'm learning what that world looks like. It's much slower. It's much more lonely to a certain extent. It's just completely different.
I know exactly why I am at this place in life but that doesn't make it any easier. The only thing I can do is know that He is faithful. I always come back to this point- i'm walking in His truth, feeding on His faithfulnees, claiming His promises, clinging to Him.
I've had so much happend this past year. The Lord has completely stripped me of everything that I thought defined me. What is amazing is that He is showing me my identity in Him. I am complete, whole, accepted, a perfect 10. I may feel like a 2, but with Christ I am a 10. I am learning what it means to walk in that identity. I am also learning what it is that makes me unique to the body of Christ. What qualities has the Lord given me, making me significant. It's a cool place to be, searching for Him, learning what it looks like to make decisions and my actions not my own, but Christ's actions through me. Learning that Christ alone can be our community. I am completely broken, making the road I am walking right now long, hard, and lonely. And this "world" that He has me in right now can simply get me down. The only thing that can snap me out of it is Him, His truth, His company. And knowing that these trials are building me, making me stronger, developing and pulling out the characteristics He has put in me. He is faithful. Bottom line, when all else fails, even when I am faithless, He is faithful.
Ok what I really what to tell. Callie and I went to see the rockettes last weekend at the Fox Theater. Seeing the dancing makes me miss it even more. I'm at this point where I see dancers performing and it almost brings me to a point of tears because I miss it so much. Crazy, I know. But I just can't right now. This is where the Lord has me. When I take class, my head goes through the roof. But I'm trusting that in His time I will be able to excerise that passion. And if not, well, Father knows best. Yet again another tangent.
So on the ride to atlanta with Cal, there was lots of time to talk. In talking to her I have realized that I'm trying to live in two completely different worlds. I don't know if any of you can relate, but if you can, you know what a trial it is. I am at home in montgomery, but I still try to live in the auburn world. I was going to auburn like twice a week. But everytime I come up there I realize that I'm not living up there. I don't know how everyone is and what the are dealing with. I don't know all the jokes anymore because I wasn't there when they happened. I enjoy the people that i love and their company, but i leave feeling even more isolated.
And talk about isolation. I am in montgomery. I don't know people my age in montgomery. Everyone I was friends with is off at school. I'm not in school, which has been such a blessing. But living a life of being in school at college is completely different from the rest of the world. When you are on your campus its so hard to remember there is a huge world out there. Life is passing you by so quickly because the college lifestyle is so quick paced. Where as outside of that "bubble" is completely different. I 'm learning what that world looks like. It's much slower. It's much more lonely to a certain extent. It's just completely different.
I know exactly why I am at this place in life but that doesn't make it any easier. The only thing I can do is know that He is faithful. I always come back to this point- i'm walking in His truth, feeding on His faithfulnees, claiming His promises, clinging to Him.
I've had so much happend this past year. The Lord has completely stripped me of everything that I thought defined me. What is amazing is that He is showing me my identity in Him. I am complete, whole, accepted, a perfect 10. I may feel like a 2, but with Christ I am a 10. I am learning what it means to walk in that identity. I am also learning what it is that makes me unique to the body of Christ. What qualities has the Lord given me, making me significant. It's a cool place to be, searching for Him, learning what it looks like to make decisions and my actions not my own, but Christ's actions through me. Learning that Christ alone can be our community. I am completely broken, making the road I am walking right now long, hard, and lonely. And this "world" that He has me in right now can simply get me down. The only thing that can snap me out of it is Him, His truth, His company. And knowing that these trials are building me, making me stronger, developing and pulling out the characteristics He has put in me. He is faithful. Bottom line, when all else fails, even when I am faithless, He is faithful.
posted by Christy G at 12/10/2005 08:18:00 AM
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