Chelsea

-Fall in Chelsea-

Psalm 121

Just wanted to share what I read this morning:

1I look up to the mountains--does my help come from there?
2My help comes from the LORD, who made the heavens and the earth!
3He will not let you stumble and fall; the one who watches over you will not sleep.
4Indeed, he who watches over Israel never tires and never sleeps.
5The LORD himself watches over you! The LORD stands beside you as your protective shade.
6The sun will not hurt you by day, nor the moon at night.
7The LORD keeps you from all evil and preserves your life.
8The LORD keeps watch over you as you come and go, both now and forever.

What an incredible truth!! I never tire of hearing the Lord will NEVER leave me. Everytime I hear this, I am left standing in awe. “Be still and KNOW that I am God”

Lately I have been searching for my identity in everything BUT Christ. I laugh at how many times I have been taught this lesson- what a patient God we serve!! Last night I was writing in my journal and the Lord shared with me some amazing truths. We have heard all of this before, but last night it spoke straight to my heart. I wanted to share with you what the Lord revealed to me last night:

Who am I? What is my identity in Christ? I am- covered by your blood. Made righteous by Your blood. Whole in you. A daughter of the King. Capable of great things with You as the center.

“Who am I, GREAT are You”. You are AMAZING. Without You I am nothing. I don’t want to exist without You by my side. “I am not, but I know I AM”. You know me better than I know myself-- WOW.

You know everything I am not and You have a purpose behind all of my inabilities and weaknesses. For Your POWER is made PERFECT in my weaknesses. You are most glorified when I step aside and You live THROUGH me. I am most satisfied when I am glorifying Your name. You ALONE deserve ALL glory and honor and praise.

I am Your warrior princess. You are MY ezer kenegdo. I have a beauty to unveil because I was made in YOUR image. Because of you, I am beautiful. I am a daughter, sister, friend. One day I will be a wife and a mother. May You ALONE be glorified in all these positions of life. The battle is already won!! Because you have already DEFEATED DEATH! I am enough in You. I am worthy of love because of You. I am wholly accepted by you- flaws and all :)

I am pressed, but now crushed. Persecuted but no abandoned. Struck down but NOT destroyed. Return to me the JOY of my salvation. With You, Father, nothing is impossible. In YOU, I can do ALL things. In YOU, I find my strength. FOREVER You are FAITHFUL!!

Life.is.Wonderful.

I love this song- thought i would share with all of you the lyrics- check out the actual song too- its really good- sorry i dont know how to put music on here or i would put it on here. but just read the lyrics....i find that they are so true.

Life is Wonderful

Words & Music By Jason Mraz

It takes a crane to build a crane

It takes two floors to make a story

It takes an egg to make a hen it takes a hen to make an egg

There is no end to what I’m saying

It takes a thought to make a word

It takes some words to make an action

It takes some work to make it work

It takes some good to make it hurt

It takes some bad for satisfaction

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A La La La La La La La

Life goes full circle

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A la la la la…

It takes a night to make it dawn

It takes day to make you yawn brother

It takes some old to make you young

It takes some cold to know the sun

It takes the one to have the other

It takes no time to fall in love

But it takes you years to know what love is

It takes some fears to make you trust

It takes those tears to make it rust

It takes the dust to have it polished

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A La La La La La La La

Life goes full circle

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A la la la la…

It is so…….

It is so…….

It takes some silence to make sound

It takes a loss before you found it

It takes a road to go nowhere

It takes a toll to make you care

It takes a hole to make a mountain

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A La La La La La La La

Life goes full circle

A La La La La La La La

Life is wonderful

A La La La

Life is meaningful.

La La La La La La La

And life is wonderful

La La La La La La La

It is so wonderful

It is so meaningful

It is so wonderful

It is meaningful

It is wonderful

It is meaningful

It goes full circle

home.sweet.home

hello world. do any of you remember that song? "hello world-this is me-life should be-fun for everyone" Definitely takes me back to eighth grade man. Ah how fun and simple life was back then. I loved that year- beach trip, Mr. Franklin's history class, softball, counting the number of times I could see Matt Anderson in one day :) haha im so serious- pathetic huh?? now on to more complicated things, but life is still just as exciting, only in a different way. I had a really rough day yesterday coming home. You think I would have been ecstatic to be home, but I guess I was just extremely overwhelmed from everything, ended up completely having a emotional breakdown. Those are always fun. Ahhh life is- what word am i looking for-- life is crazy. I feel like now days I never know what to expect. My dad and brother picked my mom and I up from the airport in atlanta. We stopped in tigertown to eat and had to pick up a book from my apartment for my sister....it was so hard to stop in auburn and not see anyone!! my parents wouldnt let me stay :( but all good. im thinkin next encounter i will make my grand appearance (ha). so ive left and come back to finish this. I 've completely lost my train of thought. I have no idea where I am going with this. Title-- yes its good to be home. Its so nice to not be in the hospital. Looking back though I have some really funny stories. I can't wait to see Elizabethtown the movie.....i've been dying to see it, think i finally get to tonight! yay. and -OMG- harry potter is so close!!!! the movie is gonna rock. who wants to go with me on opening night?? maybe ill come to au to see it with all my fellow HP fans- and i'm just gonna say- i still think Snape is good....if you think im wrong go to dumbledoreisnotdead.com -its got some pretty good stuff. WELL- im out of things to say, except that we better win this weekend!!!! War Eagle baby!!!! :)

wed-nes-day

When i was younger, i used to have to say wed. nes. day to remember how to spell wednesday. So i'm out of the hospital. good and bad i think. i am scared to be out bc i have no clue what my head is gonna do. im glad bc oh my gosh, i had to get out of that silly place. the people there were soooo negative. and i hate that i was getting annoyed bc they need to have someone who cares, but i just couldnt be around all the negativiy because i was beginning to bring me down, you know?? ahh and my head hurts right now. but dr saper said "this is the beginning, not the end" so he is going to be talking to my doctors back at home. I have so many medicines i have to take everyday. its seriously is so sad that a 19yr old has to take like four to five different medications twice a day. ahhhh, i feel like a little old lady who needs a weekly pill case to keep upwith all my meds. so i guess basically i need to ask yall to pray for me- that i have positive outlook, not negative, and that these new prevenative medicines will kick in and begin to work, and that ultimately, i can be completely healed, bc i really dont want to be on all htis medicine for the rest of my life. ahhh- my heart. i get so frustrated with myself. why do we long after things that we know we can't have. i feel like im dealing with that in so many different areas of my life right now. so i just end up being utterly frustrated with myself. i really want to get back to auburn to see everyone soon. i fly into atlanta tom afternoon and my dad is pick my mom and i up from the atl airport. i wish they would stop in auburn and let me go to encounter but if i show up tom, ill end up having to talk to a million people and explain everything like over and over again. not that i dont want yall to ask how i am. i really like feeling like people actually care about me. i dont know. i feel like i am at such a wierd place. i know i have always struggled with acceptance. thats why i was the drama queen in high school, and sometimes i still fall back into ot that. i hate it when i do, but its just bc im screaming on hte inside "please accept me". i dont know- so i was talkin to one of you, and i was just telling her how utterly overwhelmed i was that people just care. and she said you know you have always struggled with people accepting you, maybe this is God's way of showing you you really are accepted and loved. and then satan loves to attack and say no one knows what you are going through, and they dont understand. then i am left feeling utterly alone. but thats not truth-- i will NEVER be alone. and thats freaking awesome. So many times i have been in so much pain, and i truly feel like the only person who knows how i feel inside is the Lord. which may be true, but atleast i have the King of all creation who is there for me. i laugh at how when i actually put down my thoughts, i kind of think things through and work them out. so i have no idea where i am going or really what i have been ranting about for hte past how ever many lines i wrote. i probably should go back and read what i have written, but im just feeling to lazy. my first night not in the hospital and my head is killing me. BUT right there, i have to change my thinking. change my lifestyle- which is scary, but its good. so im sitting in our room at the wonderful white oak inn. my mom is watching survivor. yuck- for some reason i just do not like that show at all. but lets get excited-- Lost is next!! even though its a rerun tonight, its still so good. so im off to watch my show and enjoy looking at Sawyer :) there alot of crazy stories i want to write down from the hospital. it was really cool bc i got to know a bunch of people from all these places across the US. Everyone there couldnt believe how addicted i was to being on the computer. I really didnt think i was that bad, i mean maybe a couple of hours everyday. But the other night i was like im going to get on the computer, and sam made the comment "shes an electronic girl, in an electronic world." it was so funny. and i was like really guys, im not that bad, you should see some people i know, they really are addicted, and they were like whatever, you spend WAY to much time on that thing. oh i will miss everyone i have met up here in chelsea. but all good we got emails and such so, no worries. wow im really sorry, i feel like this post has just me venting, but really it has been. sorry if you have read all the way to here and been like what the heck christy, that was very pointless post, but it just felt good to get everything off my chest. i cant wait to get home. i cant wait to see everyone in auburn. ah-i hope tom is not a super long day of travels, and that it goes without any misshaps. yes well for real, im off to watch lost. peaceout, A-town. :)

~Just Another MaNiC mOnDaY~

oh how i love the 80s!! great music. so yea its monday--> saw Dr. Saper today (he is the man who started everything and has done most of the research for hte past 25 years in this program). So he said that we are going to try me on a prevenative that is similar to thorazine which is my protocol. The also decreased the dosage of my protocols today and gave me some more options for abortives. YAY! so it looks like i will be out of here somewhere b/t mid/end of the week. Praise Jesus, bc im so ready to come home. I'm getting a little stir crazy just sitting around this hospital. I go outside for a walk everyday, but still i just feel trapped kind of. So-- many of you are asking can you still send me mail. I think your best bet is to send it to my house in montgomery. Im going to go back there for a while when I get back from Michigan. No worries though, as soon as i feel good enough to drive to auburn and see everyone, I will be there to visit for a while. Right now its looking like spend nov and dec in montgomery and then come back to auburn for the spring semester. Ok, well that is what i want. My parents feel kind of differently- they want me to stay in the gump, but i just miss auburn way to much. Its so hard bc there is such a fine line--they talk about how distraction is a good way to cope with the pain, but i sometimes do way to many things for distraction and i end up worse than before. Well I guess its is all about finding that balance, right? :) So Ericka sent me an email with these incredible verses that have to do with healing. I want to share it with yall, bc its extremely encouraging, especially if you are seeking out the Lord to heal you either emotionally or physically. so, here we go-->

• Give God’s Word the first place in your heart. The Word of God will save your life.
  Proverbs 4:20-22
  My son, pay attention to what I say; listen closely to my words. Do not let them out of your sight, keep them within your heart; for they are life to those who find them and health to a man's whole body.
• God’s Word will not fail.
  Joshua 21:45
  Not a word failed of any good thing which the Lord had spoken…All came to pass.
  
• God’s will, healing, is working in you.
  Philippians 2:13
  For it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.
  
• The Spirit of Life is making your body alive.
  Romans 8:11
  He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.
  
• God is for you.
  II Corinthians 1:20
  For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us.
  
• It is God’s will for you to be healed.
  Matthew 8:2,3
  This scripture says that when the leper came to Jesus, he said, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean.” And Jesus said these simple words,” I am willing; be cleansed.”
  
• Obey God’s word and be healed.
  Exodus 15:26
  If you diligently heed the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in His sight, give ear to His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have brought on the Egyptians (in the permissive sense). For I am the Lord who heals you.
  
• Serve the Lord and healing will be yours.
  Exodus 23:25
  So you shall serve the Lord your God, and He will bless your bread and your water. And I will take sickness away from the midst of you.
  
• God takes all sickness away from you.
  Deuteronomy 7:15
  And the Lord will take away from you all sickness, and will afflict you with none of the terrible diseases of Egypt which you have known, but will lay them on all those who hate you.
  
• Obey all God’s commandments and receive all His blessings.
  Malachi 3:10
  “Bring all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be food in My house, and prove Me now in this,” says the Lord of hosts, “If I will not open for you the windows of heaven and pour out for you such blessing that there will not be room enough to receive it.”
  
• One of God’s benefits is healing.
  Psalm 103:1-5
  Bless the Lord, O my soul; and all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits. (And what are God’s benefits?) Who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies, who satisfies your mouth with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s.
  
• God’s Word is healing.
  Psalm 107:20
  He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.
  
• God wants you to live.
  Psalm 118:17
  I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.
  
• Choose to live. Be a fighter!
  Deuteronomy 30:19
  I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore, choose life, that both you and your descendants may live.
  
• You will live a long life.
  Psalm 91:16
  With long life I will satisfy him, and show him My salvation.
  
• Jesus bore your sins AND your sicknesses.
  Isaiah 53:5
  He was wounded for our transgressions. He was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed.
  
• God will restore your health.
  Jeremiah 30:17
  For I will restore health to you and heal you of your wounds.
  
• You can take authority over the sickness in your body.
  Matthew 18:18
  Assuredly, I say to You, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.
  
• Agree with someone for your healing.
  Matthew 18:19
  Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven.
  
• What you say will make a difference.
  Mark 11:22,23
  Have faith in God. For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, “Be removed and be cast into the sea,” and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says.
  
• Believe, and you will receive.
  Mark 11:24
  Therefore, I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.
  
• Plead your case to God.
  Isaiah 43:25,26
  I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions for My own sake; and I will not remember your sins. Put Me in remembrance; let us contend together; state your case, that you may be acquitted.
  
• Have someone lay hands on your for healing.
  Mark 16:17,18
  And these signs shall follow those who believe…they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.
  
• Worship God.
  John 9:31
  If anyone is a worshiper of God and does His will, He hears him.
  
• The devil wants to kill you; God wants to heal you.
  John 10:10
  The thief does not come except to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come that (you) may have life, and that (you) may have it more abundantly.
  
• You are redeemed from the curse.
  Galatians 3:13,14
  Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the law; having become a curse for us (for it is written, “Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree”), that the blessing of Abraham might come upon the Gentiles in Christ Jesus.
  
• You will not waver in your faith.
  Hebrews 10:23
  Let us hold fast the confession of our hope with-out wavering, for He who promised is faithful.
  
• You can have confidence in God and His word.
  Hebrews 10:35
  Therefore, do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward.
  
• You can find strength in God and in His Word.
  Joel 3:10
  Let the weak say, “I am strong.”
  
• Jesus Christ has never changed. What He did in the Bible, He will do for you today.
  Hebrews 13:8
  Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
  
• God’s highest wish is for you to be well.
  3rd John 2
  Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health, even as thy soul prospereth (KJV).
  
• Be anointed by oil by a
  Christian who believes in healing.
  James 5:14-15
  Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven.
  
• Jesus has already paid the price for your healing.
  1st Peter 2:24
  Who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness, by whose stripes you were healed.
  
• Be confident in your prayers.
  1st John 5:14,15
  Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.
  
• God answers the prayers of those who keep His commandments.
  1st James 5:14,15
  Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence toward God. And whatever we ask we receive from Him, because we keep His commandments and do those things that are pleasing in His sight.
  
• Fear is not of God. Rebuke it!
  2nd Timothy 1:7
  For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
  
• Cast down those thoughts and imaginations that don’t line up with the Word of God.
  2nd Corinthians 10:4,5
  For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds; Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ (KJV).
  
• Be strong in the Lord’s power. Put on His armor to fight for your healing.
  Ephesians 6:10-13
  Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.
  
• Give testimony of your healing.
  Revelation 12:11
  And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony.
  
• Your sickness will leave and not come back again.
  Nahum 1:9
  Affliction will not rise up a second time.

Thanks girl for sharing these verses with me-- it definitley is an excellent source of hope!!

Here is my addres in montgomery: 1012 Merrywood Drive

Pike Road, AL 36064

*All of you who have sent me mail thus far-- I cannot tell you how encouraging and how humbling each letter or card is to me when I get them. All of you have been such an amazing example of what community truly is. And I am still so humbled by the fact that so many people actually do care. Thanks to each of you-- i want to write all of you back, but i havent quite started that endevor yet, but please know how truly grateful i am :) If any of you still want to send me mail in montgomery, bring it-- i mean doesnt everyone love getting mail?? especially when it makes you feel missed and loved. Ok, theres alot more I want to write, but im really tired so i think im gonna hit the sack. Ill share more with yall later whats on my heart. Please just pray that as they start deciding when to release me, that i dont spaz out and have all this anxiety which will cause my head to go up again. And please pray that thsi new prevenative i'm starting will work!!! I love you guys, thanks for being so amazing. ~christy~

DAY 10

Today marks my 10th day in the hospital here in beautiful chelsea, michigan. for real, its beautiful here- the leaves are changing and they are incredible!!! maybe i will try to figure out how to put pics on here, so i can share with you another manifestation of our Father's beauty. So let me share what happened today-- well first all of i must explain that the weekends are really really slow here. so well now wait, back up. well on friday they talked about letting me go home on monday. i think i wrote that earlier, but they didnt decrease my dosage saturday, and then they increased my dosage today!! so they have to get me completely off my protocol meds before they let me go. today was worse than the past couple of days. im just frustrated bc i had been doing so well, then today my head was back up to a 4 (pain level scale) again today. but ok thats really not what i wanted to talk about. so i felt bad all afternoon and i watched a movie and took a nap. then at dinner, a new lady, Cindy, just checked in this weekend. she sat with us and we were talking....come to find out she is from Ann Arbor. We started talking about our favorite tv shows. So many of you know that I am obsessed with Lost. (it so good, seriously start watching it). Well for those of you who do watch it, one of the writers left the show and went to 24 this year. You can tell too bc this season on Lost the storyline moves ALOT slower. So Cindy says, well you know one of the writers is from Ann Arbor. and i was like for real? and she said, yes he grew up in Ann Arbor and then went to University of Michigan. Now if you watch the show, you will remember the episode with the video explaining the dharma initiative and that the research started in the 1970s at University of Michigan. I always wondered why they picked University of Michigan, but now we know why!! bc one of the writers went there. I feel special bc Ann Arbor is where the actual MHNI offices are, and chelsea is like twenty minutes away. Yes, and he is the one in the interviews on the first season dvd's that i thought was really cool and super cute. So i feel like we have a connection now (ha wow im so silly, but dude i love my Lost). Man, i jsut accidentally deleted like ten lines i had written. That sucks. well i wanted to write more, but my nurse if fixing to come in and tell me to go to bed. Ill come back tomorow and share with all of you my acuepuncture experience!! well thats all for now. peaceout.

the past year...

well, i was just kind of thinking about the last year of my life-- Becky sent me a card saying that "...The Rollercoaster of Life can sure take ya for some Crazy Wild Rides!...but hang on!..'cause everything's gonna be all-right!" I love that card- i feel like it is such an accurate description of life. The older i get (ha like im so old or something) but for real, the older i get, the more i realize that life progressivley becomes harder and harder. But just because life is hard, doesnt mean that life isnt good. Over the past year of my life I feel like my heart has truly come to know the meaning of "it is well with my soul". Because I'm not going to lie- life sometimes just straight up sucks- but that doesnt mean that we cannot stand before the Lord and find complete and utter joy in His presence. So many of you have heard me say that I have never felt so far away from the Lord, yet so close to him at the same time. My heart cried out before the Lord "WHY!?!". I feel like i truly know what it means to "wrestle with the Lord". But in all my questioning and frustration, He leads me right back before Him- reminding me that He is sovereign, and all glory and honor and praise belong to Him and Him alone. I love how the Word truly is the LIVING word of God. How certain scriptures pierce your heart in different situations and seasons of life. Bottom Line- God is faithful- thats all that matters- and when we begin to doubt what he is doing, we HAVE to feed on His faithfulness, cling to what He has promised us. Ever since I read captivating, I love to look at the small, and yet at the same time huge things the Lord uses to show me how he is tangibly pursuing me. I remember last fall I remember ( i think it was April) when she told us to pray "Lord make your pursuit of me tangible" That is an incredible prayer, and the Lord delights in showing us His love for us. I laugh because I remember asking the Lord to break me, let me truly expirience brokeness. I prayed that prayer las Feburary at the AUMC youth winter retreat- and look at where i have been since then- completely on my face before Him. I can honestly tell you I had no idea what I was asking for. But what a crazy ride it has been. And I cling to the promise that this too will come to pass and that as a daughter of the King I am promised abundant life! Now, that gets me excited and gives me hope. It was so funny- after I had that spinal tap about a month ago, the doctors in Montgomery told me that they have tried everything and there is nothing else they could do- I felt like the words "this world has nothing for me...so I need you Jesus to come to my rescue, where else can I go? There is no other name by which I am saved; capture me with grace- I will follow you." that was exactly where i was- even everything technology has to offer, this world truly has nothing for me. So I continued to pray Rom 15:13 "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." So then, I come to michigan- and I feel like there are three different perspectives I can look at my situtaion- medically, psychologically, and spiritually. Its been so great to be up here, because I have learned exactly what is occuring structurally, chemically in my brain causing these migraines. And then I feel I also have learned about how my behavioral habits can bring on the migraines- stress, time efficiency, the way i worry over everything and analyze it to death. And then there is the perspective that no one wants teach me about up here and that is how to look at these migraines and headaches from a spiritual point of view. I think when I heard there is no cure, only ways to try and manage my head, I almost lost all hope. what am I saying, i did lose my hope. I realized I'm having to change everything, and in my mind it may get better, but it may not. But my error in judgement occured when I started placing my hope in the things of this world. Alot of you are sending me mail (yall are amazing) but Robin sent me a card and on the bottom was this verse, "Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord, for our hope is in you alone." Ps 33:22. God is so good about calling us out, isnt He?? My hope must lie in Him and Him alone--> yes I am going to make the changes that need to be made to make my life more functional, but just because there is no cure, doesnt mean the Lord cannot or will not heal me. WOW thats so good to hear. So this is a pretty darn long post-- i just basically had nothing at all to do this afternoon :) So I wanted to share with yall this amazing quote that one of you shared with me actually last spring. I find that when i read over this my perspectives always line back up with the fact that God is sovereign and faithful and that he loves me with an unfathomable love. "Only love empowers the leap in trust, the courage to risk everything on Jesus, the readiness to move into the darkness guided only by a pillar of fire. Trust clings to the belief that whatever happnes in our lives is designed to teach us holiness. The love of Christ inspires trust to thank God for the nagging headache, the arthritis that is so painful, the spiritual darnkess that envelops us; to say with Job ' If we take happines from God's hand, should we not take sorrow too?'; to pray with Charles Foucauld: 'Abba, I abandon myslef into your hands. Do with me what you will. Whatever you may do, i thank you. I am ready for all: I accept all. Let your will be done in me and in all your creatures. I wish no more than this O Lord. Into you hands I commend my spirit. I offer it to you with all the love of my heart, for I love you, Lord, and I give myself, surrender myself into your hands without reserve, with boundless confidence, for you are my Father."

TGIF

hey people, i think im finally adjusting to being an hour ahead. its crazy to me how much one hour difference completely throws me off. well i just wanted post real quick what the doctors said this morning. Each day for the past like four days keeps getting better and better. They have me on benadryl and thorazine (those are protocols/ iv intervenous fluids....some of you actually do know what im talking about when i say all that so i put it down) anyways- those meds are making me extremely tired all the time, but they seem to be working, so hopefully my body can build up an immunity to the drowsiness side effect. But this morning (i dont see the same doctor every single morning) i saw Dr. Rosen and said lets see how things go...if i continue to do better and we can get my pain level down to a zero (here they have a pain scale so like all throughout the day the ask what is your pain level- the scale is a 1 to 5 scale). BUT if it can get down to zero they said maybe i can look at getting out at the beginning next week. wow- yea i know crazy. they say alot of times patients literally have panic attacks when they start to talk about discharing you from the hosipital, simply bc the whole what if this, what if that plays through all of our heads. Alot of people here in the hospital are local, so if something happens, they can just come back, but i was like look, chances are most likely i will not come back, this is a one time thing. Plus one of the doctors is supposed to come by today to look at my neck bc alot of you know my neck is always sore and the neck and migraines are correalted alot. If you think about it any of you who are around me alot, im always stretching my neck. everyone im talking to someone and i tell them that they are like- yea! you do!! it kinna makes me laugh- sorry tangent, not important. so basically- pray that everything will get figured out before they try to shove me out the door. now dont get me wrong, i want to come home, but i just dont want to leave here without fully benefitting from the program. plus, we are still trying to find abortives (the pain meds i take like right then when i have the head pain) and its essential for me to have three or four different types of abortives simply because if not i fall into rebound cycle- i know alot of you have heard me say im in rebound before. its like when you get a headache or migraine simply bc you have taken to much of the meds and now your body needs it so result is a migraine/ headache. AND most abortive meds can only be taken like twice a week b4 you fall into terrritory of rebounds- so thats why i need diff kinds. yes so i dont know if any of you followed any of that, but thats me trying my best to explain stuff. im also trying to hurry bc lunch started like 15 minutes ago. everyone is always hungry here, simply bc the food is ok- but all the head pain unit patients are on like a low glycemic diet ( i think thats what it is called) so basically none of us eat a whole lot, and we are always starving. yes well thats ok tho. sooo thats it for now. oh no wait- guys i got stuff from yall in the mail today- i just started crying!!! i cannot believe how much love and support all of you have just poured out. I have no idea how to express to yall how much it means, so i basically just tell you it means so much everytime one of you talk to me or message or something. ok- hope yall have a magnificent friday!!! ::christy::

im just copying and pasting what i've had up on facebook:

---> so apparently a whole lot of you have no clue where i am. let me fill you in. all of you know that i have really bad headaches. that was the reason why i had to move back home last spring. i did nothing this summer except rest and try to get better so i could come back to school this fall. so i got here and i was good at first. but then, i kept pushing myself, mainly bc i had things i had to do, and i didnt want to cut out time that i enjoyed myself (hanging out with all of you!!) so i just kept going and going. and i got worse and worse. so maybe about two/three weeks ago- i was still in auburn, but i was so sick i couldnt do anything. after about a week of that, i was like ok, i cannot do this anymore. so my parents and i basically looked at all of our options. i dropped all my classes the second to last day you could drop them, then made arrangements to come out here (michigan). We flew up here (my mom and I) tuesday. We saw the doctor on wednesday. That was a really bad day just on every level. and they told us we had to wait for a bed to open up in the hospital. So, i was a mess, along with my mother, and those of you who talked to me can testify to that. Now, i am just letting you know this information, just to make the point of how amazing the Lord is, and how present he is even through all of this- so everyone i talked to wednesday afternoon and thusday, i asked to pray for a bed. I called karen corwin and asked her for yall to pray that night during the prayer time before encounter. Well, i havent been able to talk to anyone since i have actually been admitted into the hospital (except for my family) but i am just gonna assume there was some incredible prayers lifted up and i got in on friday. yes...this is an incredibly long about me section...but at this point i dont even care, bc this is just yet another example of how the Lord is SO faithful. THANK YOU to all of you who have been praying for me. please continue to keep me in your prayers-- right now, they have me hooked up to an IV and we are trying a zillion different meds trying to figure out what works and what doesnt. besides the medical part, i am basically up here, just me and God-- which is amazing bc he is teaching me i dont need other people and there opinions to find answers, but still, attack is everywhere. wow- so everyone in the facebook community knows my heart, but i figure only the people who love me and care about me are going to take the time to read this anyway, right? so, the address-- ill be here for atleast two weeks....so you can send me mail if you want!! :) but now i know that i have access to a computer so hit me up with email, if you prefer that method of communication, or hey facebook messages work great too! ok so my address:
ATTN Christy GlassfordChelsea Community Hospital 775 S. Main StreetChelsea, Michigan 48118
ps-the website mhni is teh program that im up here in the hospital with--check it out if you really want -HA :)
*Becky Harmon--you rock...thanks for single handlely letting everyone pretty much outside of auburn know about my sitiuation, and not only that but asking for their prayers as well...you are amazing- i love you girl :)
* yay picc line got in :) so i must say, the Lord def has me up here for a reason...so many of the patients up here are just searching i feel like. there are 18 beds in the head pain unit. we have classes we have to go to everyday, so you get to know everyone pretty quick. thank you so much to all of you who have praying for me, but (haha my nurse just came and found me to give me meds...its so pathetic how much im on the computer but its my only link to the outside world right now!!) anyways....so if you wanna lift up the other people here in your prayers that would be amazing....bc i have yall and most importantly i have jesus and thats where im drawing my strength...but ALOT of these people dont, and they need him so bad, bc they are in so much pain, so yea, God is so amazing...who would have thought i would be up here in michigan talkin about how great he is :) but thats life for you. im going to figure out how to do a blog (one or two g's i dont know) ASAP yes, well that is all for now. i miss yall, hey...i have some of the yankees up here saying yall :) thanks so much for just being great friends. yall rock my world.
--->so my closing remarks are these: i think i may just leave the same thing that i had up here, bc thats still my heart. i am so blessed. wow yea. I am just standing in awe of the Lord right now. now, dont get me wrong, everyday is a battle, but just the out pouring of love and encouragemnet and support this far. All i can say is from the bottom of my heart, thank you. i love each of you in your own crazy way, and i miss auburn like no other and cant wait to get back!!!!! WAR EAGLE!!!

ill come back later when i have more time to post the latest stuff....right now im so tired from all the drugs that i am on!!!

In the beginning....

So, my title has nothing to do with my post, but since this is my first post i thought the title was kind of fun :) I really have no clue who is going to read all this, but i decided posting my updates on facebook.....well lets just say i like this better. AND i also really dont know who will read this....all of you know how i love long voice messages, emails, etc. so i am warning you in the beginning (haha there we go, pulled the title in) but for real- i probably will end up writing a ton if i have the time to. espeically since i am up here and i hardly can get intouch with anyone thanks to my wonderful phone service. plus i have a lot of time to think, so now i have a place to put all my thoughts down. So (dude i say that alot) i need to go bc Sam (my new friend from NYC who is up here at the pain clinic as well) yes well she has to get on the computer to do some school work. That's it for now. Yall let people know who do wanted to keep up with me that i started this, thanks a ton. I love yall!!! Peaceout.